اللهمارناالحقحقاًوارزقنااتباعهوارناالباطلباطلاوارزقنااجتنابه Allahumma arinal haqqa haqqaw warzuqnat tiba’ah, wa arinal batila batilaw warzuqnaj tinabah – O Allah! show us the truth as true, and inspire us to follow it. Show us falsehood as falsehood, and inspire us to abstain from it.- (Sharhul ihya, Vol. 10 Pg. 106) (Dua of Sayyiduna Abu Bakr Siddiq [Radiallahu Anhu]
Bismillah. I came across this quote that said, “Personal growth isn’t about becoming a different person, it’s about fundamentally changing how you interact with who you already are“. Growth is such a beautiful process of life. To find yourself has to be the most alluring blessing that a person could ever experience. Let’s admit it though, finding yourself is a journey and can happen more than just once. It can happen every couple of days, or a few months. Maybe even throughout the year. Regardless, it’s a journey, and the path to finding yourself becomes easier once you’ve recognized your purpose in life.
Yet, with the journey of finding oneself, a person can be tested through both good and bad. The bad days seem to stand out the most to us. Pain becomes a powerful force that envelopes every other emotion, absorbing us into what we think is a never-ending hole. So we push. We take every part of ourselves to admit that we need some fixing. But dwell on this for a minute. The best of us are those who are tested the hardest but still hold faith by not showing despair and returning directly to Him. No matter how hard the fall, this is the key. Returning to Him.
So how do we find ourselves? It’s not hard to admit that this journey involves a special kind of bravery. The world we live in is filled with so much chaos and confusion, that we often get lost in it all. We become disoriented and lose ourselves through all of the commotion. We think everything is okay, but it takes another heavy life experience to make us realize that we’re not ourselves anymore. This isn’t who we are. It takes every bit of you to ponder over, what your actions are like, your pursuits, desires, and life-long goals. It’s something that requires consistency and won’t happen over night. So this is where you make that change. This is where you transform your pain into power and allow the journey to be a little smoother. To become better. To be better.
Know, that in the process of a person becoming the best version of themselves, time and patience need to go hand in hand. But, there’s a secret tool that will make this journey easier for a believer. It’s the power of dua. You see, making dua doesn’t have to be a chore. You don’t have to put your hands in the air and recite words that you’ve memorized in classes but don’t really understand. Rather, dua is a one-way, deep conversation with Allah Azwajjal. It’s an opportunity to allow emotions that were once suppressed to be released. Open your heart to Him and tell Him what you want. Tell Him the goals and dreams that you wish to attain both in this life and the next. Express the journey you wish to be guided upon. Tell Him about your broken heart. Confide in Him and speak to Him about anything and everything. Allow yourself to be immersed and showered by His love. Don’t be afraid to speak to Allah Azwajjal.
You see, with the journey to knowing yourself, sometimes the steps you take may either lead you to fall or succeed. But know that even if you fall, pick yourself back up because Allah Azwajjal is closer to then you think. Depending on Him will make knowing yourself that much easier. Continue walking towards Him, whether it’s fast or slow, and be grateful for being aware of your journey to self-discovery. Remember the Hadith in Sahih Bukhari, “I am as My servant thinks (expects) I am. I am with him when he mentions Me.If he mentions Me to himself, I mention him to Myself; and if he mentions Me in an assembly, I mention him in an assembly greater than it. If he draws near to Me a hand’s length, I draw near to him an arm’s length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.’”
So it’s okay to fall sometimes, and more than okay to be broken. Give the broken pieces to Him and allow Him to fix you. If you need Him to answer you, call out to Him. Allow your tears to fall on your cheeks and show Him, The All-Mighty how much you require His help. Take yourself away from the belief that you will forever be lost and damaged, to I will heal and develop. This is the essential definition of what it truly means to find yourself. To allow yourself to break and give yourself the time to heal. To depend on His mercy and put your complete trust in Him to help heal you. Do this and I promise, that by the will of Allah Azjwajjal, you will feel better and be better. If you want to grow and heal your pain, love Him, love others, but don’t forget to love yourself in the process. The pain will pass. Amongst all of the trials and tribulations, hope always prevails.
Take care of yourselves dear readers. Remember that you are NOT your sins. Allah is The Most Gracious and The Most Merciful and you will be whole again. As usual, I pray that this post is brought to you in the best of health and faith. Continue persevering and becoming a better version of you. May Allah Azwajjal protect you and grant you goodness. Have a blessed Friday!