“Fear is the tool of a man-made devil. Self-confident faith in one’s self is both the man-made weapon which defeats this devil and the man-made tool which builds a triumphant life. And it is more than that. It is a link to the irresistible forces of the universe which stand behind a man who does not believe in failure and defeat as being anything but temporary experiences.” – Napolean Hill
Isn’t it insane how lost we can get when our greatest fears end up becoming barriers to possibly achieving the greatest moments in our lives? Those unwavering, constant thoughts of fear mixed with clouds of doubt, linger in the back of our minds every once in a while. They occupy large amounts of space. Large amounts of unnecessary space at that. We’re always thinking, over and over again. I speak from experience because I too have fears that I only hope to face whole heartedly one day, without constantly over evaluating the possible risks that come with it. Before I dive in, last night, I took the chance to ask friends on Instagram what their greatest fears in life were. To be quite honest, I didn’t think I’d receive an overwhelming amount of responses from people who were open to being a little vulnerable. Here were some of the fears that many of you were brave enough to share with me;
“Dying in a state not pleasing to Allah”
“Losing my rock, my mentor, my teacher, the friend I confide in – my dad”
“Dying while I’m doing something big time stupid”
“Getting cancer, having a seizure, passing out, and Devin Booker getting hurt”
“Not starting a family of my own.”
” 3 things. To never see God’s face. To not see my mom in the afterlife. To die without love.”
“lmao this sounds a rather stupid, but my biggest fear is being hated by the people I love.”
“Dying and Allah is not pleased with me.”
“Dying during a period of low Imaan. May Allah protect us.”
“I think being alone or more like feeling alone.”
“Death and Loneliness”
“Not doing enough to repay my parents for giving me life & opportunities. And even bigger fear then that, is forgetting to appreciate my parents and remember how important fear #1 is. ”
“Losing someone close to me. Either passing away or conflict spreading us apart.”
“To get wrongfully convicted and spend my life in prison because of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
“Letting my parents down.”
Many of the fears people touched on ranged from either fear of death, losing someone they love, or being a disappointment in some way. Yet, they all had one thing in common. Everyone is living with their fears rather than having a face off with them. How do we touch on our fears without losing ourselves in the process? Well first, what I can say is that it’s important to recognize that overcoming fear is a major triumph. A triumph so great, that it’s enough of a cause for celebration. A reason for relishing in the moment of surpassing yourself. But you see, not facing our fears cuts the story of our lives short. It only becomes constant what if’s and I wonder’s. I truly believe that the story of our lives only begins once we choose to do something about it. Once we courageously take the steps to overcome our fears and boldly set out on a new path.
In conjunction with the point above, it’s fair enough to recognize that there are two major aspects of our fears that generalize to what many of us experience: losing what we have at the moment, and not getting what we want. But there’s a solution to overcoming our fears, and it starts with loving where we are right now. No matter what the fear is, wouldn’t we rather have limitless opportunities than be limited by our fears? The beauty in life comes with challenging ourselves and taking on our greatest fears. It could be that facing that fear opens a new door for you that you would’ve never imagined for yourself.
More importantly, it’s essential to recognize that there can definitely be a build up of anxiety because we don’t wish to see ourselves fail. We want success. We want to be loved by our loves ones. We want to maintain our relationships with ourselves or through our connection with God. We want to be better and do better. This is all normal. It’s a part of being human. I can’t answer the question on how to not be afraid, because it’s a fleeting emotion that I too sometimes feel. What I can say though, is that there will always be fear. It’s also not about not having fear, it’s about being brave enough to face them. Yet, how we choose to face our fears, will determine whether or not we end up overcoming them.
Here are some small steps that I’ve come up with that will hopefully help both you and I overcome our fears:
1. Get to know what your fear is.
Don’t let your fear stay clogged up in your mind. Rather, take it all in and understand it more fully. Take on action to get over your fear by convincing yourself that it will pass. Your courage will become greater once you’ve expressed that your fear is a legitimate one and not all in your head.
2. Try your best to think positively
Just like fire attracts and spreads more fire, thinking fearful thoughts will only bring about more fear. Try and get yourself to think more positively and create a plan on how you can overcome your fear by managing your own personal steps.
3. Replace the energy and time placed on your fear to something else
This means that we should take action on our fears and come up with better solutions to tackle them. This can be done by finding something that inspires you or motivates you to be better.
4. Celebrate your accomplishments
What are some small/big things that you’ve achieved in the last couple of years? Remember that your moments are unique and that it took a little bit of fear and crazy obstacles to get to where you are now. Appreciate that fact and work on aiming to achieve more in the near future.
5. Talk to someone.
Yes. This is so important. Don’t bottle up your fears and keep them to yourself. Just like many of the responses above, you’d be surprised to see that many of us share similar fears to one another. Express yourselves and find a support system that works best for you.
With that, it’s my hope that this blog post is beneficial to you in some way. Continue dreaming big and don’t allow your fears to become a reason that you lose yourself. Continue loving one another and continue spreading love. I pray that you’re all in the best of health and that no matter the trial, the light within you continues to shine bright.